Sometimes I'm so awesome I amaze my own damn self.

renfamous:

British Kitchen Nightmares: “The risotto is overcooked and your restaurant needs new lighting.”

American Kitchen Nightmares: “YOUR STAFF DOES DRUGS ON THE CLOCK, YOUR FAMILY THINKS YOU’RE AN ASSHOLE AND THERE’S A LIVE RAT IN MY FOOD.”

alexanderhamiltonisthebottom:

share a coke with a  c o m r a d e 

windwolf0097:

dirtylittledamsel:

this is more dramatic than a Lana Del Rey music video

windwolf0097:

dirtylittledamsel:

this is more dramatic than a Lana Del Rey music video

image

infinite-mirrors:

i think if you take out the music it becomes pretty clear that red and black is the comic relief of the show

snickidoodle:

american public school means if you record your teacher behaving inappropriately and show it to administration they would get you in trouble for having your phone out during class

patientlights:

voliminal:

I am so sad.

no sadness friend

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me on a spanish test: cómo se llama, bonita, mi casa, shakira shakira

thereddwarfer:

universe—cosmos:

Imagine how it would look if the Orion nebula is only four light years away - the distance the nearest star is to us, instead of 1,300 light years. It would be so bright that we wouldn’t be aware of the dark sky. We wouldn’t see other stars. The whole world would be the Orion nebula and the sun.

-The Universe 2x14: Nebulas

plasmatics-life:

Spring water - {by Kicub Keane} | {Follow on Flickr}

superclones:

Agents of SHIELD commentary: Elizabeth Henstridge on “FZZT”.

letsmakeloaf:

nobody’s ever really happy to find out they’ve stayed up too late.

it used to be a cool achievement but now it’s like

"fuck. god damn it. not again. shit."

danielkanhai:

i bought this bonsai tree growing kit for three dollars and i know nothing will probably grow, but who could beat that price, right? after i soak the seed pod for 24 hours i have to keep it in the fridge for three months to trick it into thinking winter has passed. it’s probably the biggest prank i’ll ever pull on a seed. like psych, buddy, you thought winter was over? that was the god damn crisper drawer oh shiiit.